My girlfriend is depressed recently and i think its because of of the loss of a close family member, it's been 4 years since the person died but its come back now and its really getting her down, she is crying alot and gets bad thoughts.
What can I do to help her?
I am really worried about her, she isnt the same anymore, its been like this for about a week
Answer:
Is it near the anniversary of the death? I always find i think about the departed ones at that particular time.
take her to church and she can talk to a clergy there i lost my mom just last month i know what shes going thru for me though nothing helps i just have to give it to God each day to deal with for me
Be there for her and help her express her feelings. She may need to talk to a licensed counselor though and suggest that you will go with her.
The best advice for you to give her is to give her the name of a clergyman or pastor close by whom you know or could recommend. If you dont know one then ask your parents etc. She needs spiritual guidance if it has been 4 years, That has gone on long enough. It will be the best advice you can give her. Also consent to go along with her on her first counseling session. (clergyman)
This is always a tough situation, but I suggest doing some fun things with her that will get her mind off her loss.
Greiving is good, but not for so long. There's nothing wrong with missing someone who's passed, but so long afterwards isn't healthy.
If the problem continues, maybe suggest to her that she talks to a professional. If this bothers her, suggest that you'll go along with her because you just want to help her and see her happy again.
Just be there to love and support her. If it continues seek professional help. ie: psychologist, minister, etc
Everyone deals with their grief in different ways, and there is no time limit on when it ends or when it can start up. Something may have happened that has triggered her depression now, even though this person died 4 yrs ago.
Help her to realize that she needs to get professional help. There are MDs and meds that can help one return to a normal life. You can be supportive and loving for her, but it sounds as if she has pretty severe symptoms. Sometimes these symptoms can worsen. There is nothing wrong with asking a professional for help when you can't get past what is bringing you so far down. Good luck and you are a good person for helping her through this rough time.
Hi,
My husband lost his mom 4 years ago. It was the hardest thing we ever dealt with. He was only 25 years old and thought he would have his mom much longer.
If things aren't too out of hand...just be there for her. Listen to her. Hold her. Comfort her.
If you can afford it and have the time...maybe surprise her with a mini getaway to get her mind off things. Maybe to a B%26B at least an hour from home. A change of venue.
But, if she seems so bad and she is having scary bad thoughts you might gently talk to her about maybe seeking a professional to talk to. They can help her sort this all out.
So sorry and hope it all works out well.
Very often, the best thing to to is be with her and sit with her, your presence itself should be comforting to her. Also, very often, the best thing to say is absolutely nothing. All your efforts to cheer her up are likely to make her angry with you. She will see your spoken efforts as an attempt to discount and invalidate her pain. So, let her feel what she must and go through the grieving, but just "be there with her" is all she really wants.
I hope this is helpful
well i lost close family members be4 and i know its hard but just tell her that wen she crys it maks them feel bad and that she will one day see them agen.
All people grieve differently...some for short periods and others it takes years. The best thing you can do is just be there for your friend and not 'harp' on it or try to tell her how to feel or when to stop. Time really will help, even though it's been 4 yrs..pain of losing a loved one never goes 100% away but will soften. If you really care about this person you'll just be there listening over and over again. Try to get your friend involved in something helpful to others..a purpose. Take your friend to the cemetery and let them 'pour out' once in awhile and then live!
I know it is hard and you cannot put a time on when to stop grieving, however after four years she needs to move on. I would suggest calling a hospital and ask if they have a grief counseling program or a group that meets once a month or whatever to talk. Perhaps, then she will see that she is not alone and that other people are going through the same thing. She needs help to get on with her life. Tell her that the loss of the close family member would want her not to grieve but to get on with her life. GOOD LUCK!
Four years is a long time to have such a Strong bereavement reaction. It is time she consider what she can do about rebuilding her life after this loss. For many going to group or seeking the help of a pastor, counselor or doctor is helpful in getting a start on the work ahead. clearly her heart is broken and it is time to seek the help she need to mend and rebuild a new life.
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