i just cry all the time. it's taking over my life. i literally spend hours every day crying %26 just feeling completely overwhelmed. the only thing that helps me is cutting or smoking weed. i hate it. i hate it (the cutting that is). especially the scars when i have to wear a sweatshirt even tho its like 95 degrees out %26 i always feel dizzy from bleeding all the time i think. but it is seriously the only thing that relaxes me. i have given up trying to see a psychiatrist/ologist whatever. whenever i go its like i blank out n forget that anything is even wrong with me can't even explain it. i dunno why i'm writing this like there's just nothing i can do. i tried antidepressants didnt work for me. i dont think there was ever even a period of time when it wasnt like that so idk if there is even a way for me to be "normal" or if i would know what thats even like.
Answer:
You should keep a journal and write everything you were feeling, especially when you cut. Write down anything that comes to mind, the reason you wanted to do it. What you felt like when you did it, if you regreted it afterwards. And keep a journal of everything else in your life. Then make an appointment with a different pshyciatrist, bring the journal in and tell them that you have a tough time expressing yourself when you meet with a pshyciatrist so you've brought a journal in to help explain what your experiencing. Tell them the meds you've tried and explain if you took them as prescribed or not. And then allow them to try different medications till they find what works for you.
Then you need to get an appointment with a pshyco-therapist. (I see one) they deal with trama and things like what your going through. You may have to try a couple different ones before you find one your comfortable with, then stick with regular therapy. Between medication and therapy there is hope that you can recover from cutting yourself, and start to feel better.
Good luck
you need to see your doctor its not good to feel/be like that all the time. you probably have depression and or anxiety disorder
How long did you take the antidepressants before deciding they didn't work? You really need to see a doctor. Write down what you need the doctor to know so when you get there you don't draw a blank. Good luck! Get help someone needs you! ;)
The single most destructive human emotion is self pity. I am very serious. Think hard about this answer. It is not a put down.
You are "normal" inside...you've just lost your way a bit. I really feel for you as I know what depression can do to a person.
If you have a "good" day (and I know they are all bad, but some are worse) then try your hardest to seek out some sort of help which suits you better than the analasys you have had before.
If there is any family member that you can talk to then please try...there is a corner that you will eventually turn and you will be happy again...I guess you can't remember what it feels like but thats part of the illness.
Be kind to yourself,often people who are sufferers of deppression are gifted artstically..try to find an outlet creatively and hang on in there.
look for a therapist, problems like that need to be fixed before it goes too far...
I haven't done the cutting. Everything else, I have been through and more. I have a friend who used to cut. So I know a little about it. The counseling and med's will help, a little. Though, it takes time and COMPLETE HONESTY. Write down or tape record what you need or want to say. It took me 5 years, leaving a bad situation, counseling, med.'s and HELPING MYSELF, for me to feel "normal" again. I still have my days. However, they are not near as bad. My friend I mentioned, did the same things and she is doing better as well.
These are things we did to help ourselves:
Get out of the house, go do something (different activities) to get your mind off of it, talk to people, exercise, eat right (6 small well balanced portions a day), no (or not a lot of) junk food or sodas, drink lots of water, Study and apply positive thinking, self control, and improving your self esteem techniques, listen to cheerful or peppy music, dance, etc.
If you're in a bad situation and can get out.
This isn't going to be easy. It's a lot of hard work and dedication on your part. You may have to force yourself to do these things. One is not as effective as the other. If you want a better life you will do it. It will get better. You CAN do it.
If you want to talk e mail me. P.S. I'm not trying to preach. However, the pot will only work for so long. Then it will have NO effect. Except maybe to have made your condition worse. Only you have the power to help yourself. So do it, NOW. GL
honestly I was in your shoes before and 1) i grew out of it somewhat (feelings are still there, i just realized it had to stop) and 2) I started writing in journals. I have 14 of them full from age 14 until now, I'm 25. antidepressants didnt help me, cutting was instant gratification for a while but even that thrill went away, and as I got older I realized that most of my depression WASNT depression it was anxiety. Im on buspar now and have been for two years and I feel better than I ever have. Ive been in three hospitals and been on countless meds zyprexa, paxil, depakote, prozac, elavil, celexa. blah blah blah it was treating my anxiety that helped and finding a safe outlet (writing). I still have days where all I want to do is cry but i find it managable. I used to keep a journal that I gave to my psychaitrist to read at every visit because I found that the physical act of speaking just would NOT happen when I was pressured to discuss how I felt with a stranger. That made it a little easier on me, maybe you could try that? I hope you find what works for you sooner rather than later like I did, cuz god knows it hurts and you will never feel more alone. Good luck!
Yes, I am experiencing this. I had to have someone else get help for me.
Yes, you can feel normal again.
First- you need to find a doctor YOU feel comfortable with. The first doctor I had- ugh- Whenever I left his office I felt worse than when I went in. The pills he gave me, did nothing.
The second doctor my husband found for me is sooo much better. He is no nonsense but still compassionate. I feel that he WANTS me to get better. He prescribed a different pill and that worked for awhile. When I told him I was crying again, he upped the dosage.
I am still trying to get a handle on my depression (thats the diagnoisis).
Remember- there is a difference in the doctors. One can prescribe medication (and usually has short office visits to monitor progress- but not "trying to get to the root of the problem" discussions). The other is talk about your feelings visits and is usually 45 min to 1 hour. ( I dont think I am getting much out of this doctor's visits but I still go.)
Please try again with a new doctor. Get someone to drive you to the appointments if you have to.
I would be happy to share my experiences with you if you want. I can tell you which prescript. I am taking.
Science is a trial and error deal. You must keep trying.
Cutting yourself is NOT good. You MUST find a way to stop that. Please please seek some help!
good luck!
Maybe I am too old to understand the cutting thing. It sounds just awful! How did it even began? You said that the anit-depressants you took didn't help. There are others you can try. Have you tried hormone therapy for your depression? Or had your thyroid checked? How old are you? Do you live alone? Do you have a pet, friends or anyone you trust that you can lean on?
I am scared for you. Please seek help.
Like some other people have said... KEEP A JOURNAL! Not only will you have a record of your feelings, you will have the opportunity to release them. I started my journals about 40 years ago. I was a different person then. I forgot so many things that I felt and why I felt that way. But that is what made me what I am today, and I like myself now.
I found my best friend eight years ago over the Internet in a support group for an operation we were both having at the same time. She is wonderful. I vent and she replies. My friends and family don't know her. We share parts of our lives that we don't share with anyone else. It is safe and I totally trust her.
I wish I could come and put my arms around you. You sound like you need someone in your life who loves you and will be strong for you. Love heals. Please take care and get help. You will be in my prayers.
i am only 13 but i am at a similar position as you. i really dont like to talk abt my cutting and want to stop but it is so addictive. i cried so much that i cant cry anymore. i tried talking before but it just make me feel worse. I know nothing seems to help but u can find some thing that u enjoy doing or try to remember your good days ( i know it seems that there isnt any but i am sure u will find some). try not to be alone .
I personally think you are stuck in a cycle Stress than depression in couple than the whole thing disappeared and of months it haunts you back. i ve been feeling like this for years. But i am sure u can get back on the grounds. u may just need a change of enviroment or something like that?
i hope my advice helps you. u can talk to me if u want to my e-mail is chankirstychan@hotmail.com
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